Billie Lourd Reflects on Her Mother Carrie Fisher’s Death 9 Years Later

Billie Lourd he thought of his mother’s death Carrie Fisher nine years ago.

“It’s been 9 years since my mom died,” Lourd, 33, wrote on Instagram on Saturday, December 27. “My daughter woke up earlier than usual this morning so we went out together and she deliberately put her little head on my chest. She looked at me with her big soulful eyes and said ‘I love you mom’ and then she cupped my face in her chubby little hands and kissed me.”

I American Horror Story The actress shared that her daughter, Jackson Joanne, 3, greets her with a kiss “pretty much every morning.” (Lord and his husband, Austen Rydell, and share a 5-year-old son, Kingston Fisher.)

“I dare say, there is no better way to wake up and there is no culture that I like more,” he argued. “I told him how much his grandmother would love him and he just looked at me and kissed me again.”

Billie spent the anniversary of Fisher’s death in 2016 watching her father, a Hollywood talent agent. Bryan Lourdrun with her children “like 2 old souls who know each other forever.”

“Watching my father and my children is one of the happiest things I’ve ever known,” Lourd emphasized. “The kind of happiness that makes your face hurt because you can’t stop smiling, the kind of happiness that makes you feel like your life is a movie that you thought only existed in movies.

During that special moment, Billie remembered thinking that “this happiness would not have existed without my mother.”

“This happiness only exists because he was there,” he realized. “Therefore, although he is not a part of this happiness physically, he is part of the reason for this. Even though he is gone, he lives on in this happiness.”

Billie admitted that her “grief takes many forms” but now she feels “joy” that her children get time to spend with their grandfather.

“[My feelings] I can change and I will change situations many times throughout this day because sadness is not just one thing but right now I am enjoying this bittersweet happiness,” he concluded.” As my mother wisely said, ‘Nothing ever really ends. There.’ My mother’s life is not really over. Right there – in my children and in this happiness that I am able to find because of him. Thank you mom. I will never stop missing you.”

Fisher died on December 27, 2016, after suffering a heart attack on a flight from London to Los Angeles following the conclusion of a book tour in Europe. A coroner’s report determined that Fisher had cocaine, heroin, other drugs and MDMA in his system.

Adding to Billie’s grief, her grandmother – and Fisher’s mother – Debbie Reynolds he died one day later due to burst blood vessels and caused bleeding in his brain.

Billie looked back on her mother’s long struggle with addiction on what would have been Fisher’s 68th birthday in October 2024. (Fisher spoke openly about her volatile life and lifelong drug addiction.)

“I did everything in my power to help my mother to drink alcohol but the sad thing is that my mother could not escape her addiction. But when she was alive she always told others about the ups and downs of that struggle in the hope that it will help them to escape their addiction,” explained Lourd on Instagram at the time. “As an addict, being open about the struggle is the only way to get through it. And the same goes for us who have been affected by this struggle. Sending my love to anyone who has lost another drug addict. You are not alone. ❤️”

Most recently, Fisher opened up in March about her family’s legacy in the entertainment industry — and how she differs from both her late mother and grandmother.

“I can definitely say that comedy is genetic. They were better than me. I can dance a little bit, not like … young Debbie Reynolds, but that’s genetic, although my mother likes to tap dance,” he said. People. “I’m a very different person, completely different from both of them. Well, it’s something you learn from generation to generation. I think I learned to balance my life and my work in a different way than they were able to do, and that was also a product of the times.”

Billie is perhaps best known for acting Scream Queens again American Horror Storyand playing Lieutenant Connix in the star Wars sequel trilogy, alongside Fisher.

If you or someone you know has a substance abuse problem, contact the National Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) at 1-800-662-HELP (4357).